Picking up the pieces after Greg died was harder than I ever could have imagined. I thought I was there in the past for friends who lost children; I thought I was there for my step-daughter when she lost her half sister. Now I feel like I let those people down, then again I know there really isn't anything people can do but lend a shoulder or an ear.
The changes in my world view were dramatic. Every employee at a ski resort suddenly was under suspicion of drug use in my mind. They all contributed they all are throwing their lives away. It took a long time almost a full two years to stop that line of thinking. I had to remember who I was at my core. I had to remember that I am a believer in people not a doubter or a nay sayer. I had to remember that people are generally good and that sometimes good people do bad things.
Every time I see a new place or even read of a new place I think of how Greg would have loved it. I think of how he might have seen it. I think of the life he could have had. I am not sure if that is the right way to think of it but it is what it is.
Now I focus on the positive I focus on being there when the wave of grief hits my parents. I think of helping others.
Life is on track for me again. Real Estate, healing from a car wreck, enrolling into college for a Bachelors degree at almost FORTY... is exciting, frustrating and scary all at once.
Life is one step at a time and we move forward coping how we can.
Addiction sucks, and I truly hope that those who seek help receive the support they need and reach out to love ones when they need more.
#addiction #recovery #death
No comments:
Post a Comment